Questions to get un-stuck

Often we feel stuck in life.  Sometimes we don't even have specific complaints - it's just a vague feeling of dissatisfaction.  This vagueness is one of the reasons for being stuck - a lack of clarity and definition gives your mind little to work with.  When you have a vague feeling of incompleteness or that something is lacking in your life, it can be helpful to ask the following questions.  Take the time to be very specific.


  • What is wrong?  What specifically bothers you about your current circumstances? Look deep to see what is causing your uncomfort. Be precise.
  • What details contribute to this problem?  Include the people, places, and things involved.
  • What do you really want?  Do you have a clear picture of what will truly make you happy? Visualize yourself in the new set of circumstances.
  • How have you personally contributed to the current situation? 
  • Why are you contributing to the situation and why have you not resolved it?  Is it fear, complacency, a lack of knowledge, guilt?
  • What can you do now to begin to change the situation?
  • What have others done to solve similar problems? 
  • What can you learn to do to change the situation?
  • What metrics can you use to measure your progress?
  • How will you know when you are done?
Zen Presence - Ideas for Meaningful Living
NLP

10 comments:

  1. Yay! I'm not the only one who chooses to use the phrase "dissatisfied" to describe those bad days I have. My husband seems a little confused when I'm obviously having a bad day, and I can only explain that I'm dissatisfied with things. In his defense, I really don't get any more specific than that-who wouldn't be lost? He's a helper, and I'm giving him no direction on how to help me. Although, that is really only something I can do myself.

    I'm working on not getting caught up in my feelings, and taking a step back to look at the whys and hows, and what resolutions are needed. Those questions will be a great guide the next time I'm feeling that way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Men usually will want to solve your problems when you share them. We rarely understand the need to just have someone listen.

      These questions have helped me before and I'm using them now in another area of my life.

      Thanks for commenting Jamie.

      Dan

      Delete
  2. I really like these specific questions, Dan. It takes the guess work out of it. Only when we got really specific with our dissatisfaction did we begin to make changes. Before that, it was easy just to flip on the old TV or read a book and push it behind the shutter in our brains for one more day. Great advice! Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Tammy,

      I'm really enjoying your new book. Just started it last night and I'm about 1/2 way through.

      Dan

      Delete
    2. Hi Dan, I'm so glad you're enjoying it! I'm so lucky CJ came on to read your post, and he told me about this comment. For some reason, I am not getting responses. Please let me know if I'm doing something incorrectly. I never knew you responded to comments, but I just came back again and again because the content is so good!

      Delete
  3. Small changes seem to make a huge differences when taken one day, one step at a time in order to change.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree Mike, but by asking the appropriate questions we can ensure we are moving in the right direction.

      Dan

      Delete
  4. Love your self questioning questions, Dan. For a quick reset to rid myself of dis-ease, I like a change of environs or routine. I often underestimate the quick and profound affects this can have on my thinking. Perhaps I can combine the questioning with a change in environs. Have a super fun weekend and glad you are liking the book;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Timely post, Dan. That's all I can say now.

    Never before, have I been so un-stuck. Today is a day I will always remember.

    Thank you for being a part of the journey. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. The theme of these questions is taking responsibility for yourself--always a pre-requisite to getting un-stuck!

    ReplyDelete