Taking Full Responsibility - Change Your Life



Get rid of "should" and "have to".  Do What You Want.

Does that sound like responsible advice?

I'm afraid that's what you must do to take full responsibility for your life.  Notice that I didn't say do what you  feel like doing.  You may not feel like going to the grocery store this afternoon but want to because you want to eat.

This is not just semantics.  Anytime we use the words "should" or "have to" we are shirking responsibility.  We are saying either we have no choice or that we're trying to live up to someone else's idea of what we should do with our lives.  Having no choice is a lie and living to someone else's expectations is a sad mistake.

Look closely at your life.  What pressures do you feel to do something or be somewhere?  Why?  Is it because you want to?  If not, look deeper.

There is nowhere we must be and nothing we must do if we are taking full responsibility for our actions.


If you still feel pressure to do something then at least admit to yourself - I want to do this because I don't have the strength to say no or to let 'so and so' down.  Be honest with yourself and remove your excuses.  You will find your attitude will change drastically and you might even muster the courage to say no a little more often. 

Try a little soul searching to find what you want in life,  then do the things that will bring it about.

Identify the things that you don't want to do and stop doing them.

This is not an exercise for the faint of heart.  Don't even waste your time if you're not willing to go deep and work with it.  .

With a little lot of work and effort in learning to DO WHAT YOU WANT, your life will change dramatically.  I promise you that your life will improve if you work at this.  You will have more energy, more passion, and more peace.  If you want one on one help with changing your life, feel free to contact me at dgarner23@gmail.com

Using this method and a few of the following ideas can turn your life around:

Instantly Improve Your Life with One Step

Proven Methods to Improve Your Happiness

Learning to Live In the Present Moment

Six Steps for Building Strength

Thoughts + Energy = Your Reality



Because I feel so strongly about this - because I see so many that feel powerless in life - I am asking you to share a link to this article if you like it.  Tweet it, Facebook it, Pin it, email a line,  or all of the above.  This approach has brought so much change, meaning, and peace to my life in such a short amount of time that I want to share it with as many others as I can.  Although I'd rather you link here - steal it if you prefer - just spread the word.

I found this method and other great ideas in Supercoach: 10 Secrets to Transform Anyone's Life by Michael Neill



Zen Presence - Ideas for Meaningful Living
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12 comments:

  1. I just got into a discussion about this with my husband. I was scouted to be on a food truck show. He said great exposure and I said, "But I don't want to be on a food truck." Back and forth... I feel like I am at a point in my life that I better start saying... I don't want to do this,,, I want to do this... You have to believe that life will turn out fine doing what you want to do. Thanks for the reminder. I will share.

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    1. "You have to believe that life will turn out fine doing what you want to do."

      You are so right Diane. Part of the concept is that there is no one correct way to do this and there are no fixed paths. There are infinite possibilities - pick your own.

      Dan

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  2. "There is nowhere we must be and nothing we must do if we are taking full responsibility for our actions."

    So often, we define ourselves, are desires, and our wants by what other people tell us to do. Taking responsibility is empowering but scary--we can't make excuses, can't blame anyone else, can't have pity parties....but we just might be able to make our wildest dream come true.

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    1. The concept is hard to fully embrace at first - we've been taught otherwise. Scary soon turns to exciting and wonderful.

      Dan

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  3. Thank you, thank you, thank you for this, Dan! More people need to hear this message. CJ and I have been working very hard to live like this. This message is so important and so overlooked when people work to improve their lives. Can you see me over here in Houston - I'm jumping up (in my brain as I'm in a coffee shop!) and down saying YES! YES! YES!

    Especially loved this line: Having no choice is a lie and living to someone else's expectations is a sad mistake.

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    1. Thank you Tammy. I SEE YOU! I appreciate you reading and taking the time to comment.

      Dan

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  4. It would be weird to stop with the "should" and "have to"s. Wonder what that would be like. I think it'd be life changing, man.

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    1. Try it TB! Take the plunge - you'll never turn back.

      Dan

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  5. yup. sharing. i especially like the line "Identify the things that you don't want to do and stop doing them"... I've undertaken a few BIG changes in my life recently. I moved across a big ass country, worked for a multi-national corporation and then quit.. And now I'm doing what I want to do. I just did it. And it's working out beautifully. Make the decision, check the fear, do it. love it.

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  6. " And it's working out beautifully"

    Thanks for the report Kristy! Good to hear from others that it's working for them as well!

    Dan

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  7. A few years ago, I found myself exhausted and more than a little resentful of all the pressures on me. I had been taught to always say yes so people would like me and not be angry with me. I finally had enough and stood up. It wasn't always pretty, some people didn't take it too well that I began to say no.

    Then a couple of months ago I agreed to help a family member out through a rough time, unfortunately they began to take advantage. I sat down and explained I wouldn't be doing so much any more as it wasn't what I wanted to do all the time. I don't know if they realize how serious I am, but I can't fall back into that pattern again.

    Great message Dan. Hope everyone who reads this takes it to heart and gives it a try, as you say it is life changing to stop doing what you don't want to do.

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  8. There's a really good idea embedded in this post. I have to wonder if it might not be a good idea at all times, though. I mean, there are times when what I really WANT to do is go to the ocean, start swimming, and just keep going until I can go no more. However, I SHOULDN'T. I have felt too guilty about the concept of not outliving my parents to ever actually do that.

    Maybe trying to live up to someone else's idea of what we should do with our lives sounds bad, but if I HADN'T been trying to live up to someone else's idea of what I should be and be doing with my life from time to time, I wouldn't even be alive at all now.

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